Welcome to the
Candy Candidates Gallery!
What are Candy Candidates?
They're delicious all-edible confections made of sugar-paste, which is a kind of British marzipan-like fondant icing you roll out and cover cakes with or make decorations with like these. It tastes just like the marshmallow charms in Lucky Charms breakfast cereal. It dries hard but it still smells yummy even after a few years.
Yes, you could eat any of these little sugary candidates, if you didn't mind just the tiniest bit of toothpick getting into your system. Mostly they're colored with food coloring, kneaded in or painted on, and they stand about 2 1/2 to 3 inches tall, weigh about 3 1/2 ounces, and I estimate they're about 400 calories apiece.
Visiting the Gallery:
Each Candy Candidate is featured in his own page. You can visit the ones you want by clicking individual names on the list below, or take the tour of all of them by clicking on Take the tour! and then clicking the next icon at the bottom of each page. I've included a few of my favorite photos of each one to give you a good look at him, and I've written a little bit about the real-life candidate who inspired him. If you find any mistakes, just remember, admission is free, and blame Wikipedia!
Be sure to check out the Candy Candidates Fun pages in which I had a bit of fun with the Candy Candidates!
And when you're finished seeing the whole gallery, be sure to check out my fun Candy Candidates designs on all kinds of great products at my Cindythings Shop at Cafepress, where you can pick up a fun tee shirt, mug, or other fun souvenir to commemorate your visit and prove to the world you are far cooler and hipper and more political than anyone previously realized.
And if you haven't seen my Candy Magicians Gallery and Candy Mentalists Gallery yet, be sure to check them out! If you like the Candy Candidates, you'll enjoy the Candy Magicians and Candy Mentalists, too. They're really fun!
Answers to the questions I get asked most often about
my candy beltway boys can be found below.
Thanks for coming! Have fun visiting! And please don't eat any of the exhibits!
Question: Who makes them?
Answer: Me. My name is Cindy Atmore. I'm a California artist and writer and the Queen of Cindythings, my pop art web empire. I am also a cable news politics junkie! I'm married to a famous mind reader named Joe Atmore and I made part of this candy collection living for two and a half months in the 5-Star Hyatt Regency Hotel in Cologne, Germany, with Joe and our pet six-toed cat Tiki, while Joe helped make our famous paranormalist spoon-bending friend Uri Geller's television series in Germany and Holland, "The Next Uri Geller" and "Die Neuwe Uri Geller," especially amazing. I helped out by eating all the candy in the green room before each broadcast and strongly suggesting that Candy Uri Geller should make an appearance on the show, but no one listened. I also ate all the candy at the Stefan Raab Show, Germany's late night Letterman-style talk show, in case anyone is wondering what happened to it all, and no one listened to me there, either. Thanks for the candy!
Question: Why did I make them?
Answer: I decided to make every candidate running in the 2008 presidential race out of candy because I watch enough cable news political coverage to know the real issue in this election isn't the economy or foreign relations or who is bitter. The big question keeping most of us awake worrying that the phone is going to ring at 3 a.m. is...which presidential candidate makes the SWEETEST EDIBLE NOVELTY?!
Before the Candy Candidates, I started out making Candy figures when I created some Candy Mentalists for a cake for a party for a bunch of mind readers. Then I made the Candy Magicians because shortly after the Candy Mentalists Gallery launched in May 2007, MAGIC Magazine asked me to make a few Candy Magicians for an article they wanted to do on the Candy Mentalists to coincide with their Sweet 16th anniversary. They also wanted some to display at the opening party for their huge "MAGIC Live!" Convention in Las Vegas. So I did! They've also been featured in the brand new edition of a great, award-winning magical art book, The Art of Deception, by Chuck Romano, and were spotted by a producer from the Food Network who has expressed an interest in featuring them on one of his fun food shows! I've also made four commissioned custom chess sets featuring all the members of a famous British magical family including the pet dogs!
Question: Where are they kept?
Answer: They're currently being kept on a stars and stripes serving tray on my dining room table in case we run out of German chocolate and the five pounds of candy I caught at the Carnival parade in Cologne. But when major politicians drop by for dinner I hide the Candy Candidates because the politicians always want to eat their rivals from across the aisle for dessert.
Question: What am I going to do with them?
Answer: I'm challenging the U.S. Senate to proclaim an Official Cindythings Candy Candidates Day! If they do, maybe the whole Candy Candidates gang will come out for a visit and testify before the Senate, but they'll probably just come and eat the free lunch and take the Fifth. If they even get that far, they might get thrown off the plane for misbehaving, they have a sugar problem. After that maybe I'll donate them to the Smithsonian, but only if the Smithsonian will build them their own wing so they can be in charge. But one of them, the lucky winner of the Oval Office, is hoping first to be joined by the next first family and be displayed alongside the official White House Gingerbread House next Christmas!
Question: How do I make them?
Answer: Drinking Frappuccinos, eating cupcakes, listening to something educational like I Love Lucy or Bewitched or Hardball with Chris Matthews, and giggling. Or, when I'm taking photos of them, sometimes wearing rubber boots and other protective gear because every time my cat Tiki sees me photographing Candy figures, she turns into Kato from the Pink Panther movie and ambushes me. When I was photographing a big set-up of Candy figures recreating the Boston Tea Party she attacked from under the table, grabbed the sparkly cloth underneath everything, and knocked the whole thing flying! I got scratched so I really suffer for my art. My cat is very scary but at least I don't have to worry about the political press getting unauthorized photos of the Candy Candidates being naughty with her around.
Question: Can I buy one?
Answer: I would much prefer you buy my fun, hip, cool Candy Candidates merchandise in my Cindythings Shop at Cafepress, including tee shirts, caps, badges, and bumper stickers, because then I can just earn money while I watch the Bob Newhart Show and eat cupcakes! But, if you desperately want one and can't live without one and you're a U.S. Senator or Congressman or White House Oval Office-holder or billionaire or MSNBC's Dan Abrams, I'll think about it!
Question: who do I want to win the election?
Answer: I personally would prefer if the presidential race had no end and no winner ever because I am addicted to all the cable news political drama and debates! I think the wall-to-wall campaign coverage for the 2012 race should start the minute the votes are counted for the 2008 election, if not before.
Question: Who do the Candy Candidates want to win the election?
Answer: Me. I've told them if I don't win, I'm going to eat every last one of them because I'm really power hungry, so they're nervous. They have each illegally registered to vote under two hundred different names just to be sure I win. They can be very naughty and get into trouble when they have time on their hands, so it's always best to give them something constructive to do like rig an election or stage a coup.
question: How did I become such a brilliant political expert, am I involved in politics outside of watching it on t.v.?
Answer: I have experience and I am ready to lead. I once ran for Treasurer of Randall Elementary School when I was eleven, only I got sick and my best friend Viola had to give my assembly speech telling the whole school to vote for me. Luckily I got better just in time to vote, but in a fit of graciousness I cast my vote for my opponent, who won, probably by one vote. So you see I have killer political instinct and am truly ready to take charge of the nation at a moment's notice.
Question: If Asked would I accept the vice presidential nomination or a cabinet appointment?
Answer: I would have to decline due to conflict of interest. All of those cabinet meetings would interfere with my important activities as a sugarpaste lobbyist.
Question: Am I available to appear on "meet the Press?"
Answer: I'm sorry, it's too early in the morning. As everyone knows, pop artists can't be seen before noon or dismiss their entourage before midnight, so they'll have to make do without me. But I am more than willing to lend my gravitas to any afternoon political shows. My 64 page rider (short abridged version) explaining the foods and colors of upholstery and number of bottles of Evian water for drinking and washing I require in the Green Room and the number of assistants I will require at my beck and call and most importantly my hair styling staff and manicurist and court poet and entourage accommodations and list of acceptable other guests is available on request. I also can't be asked any hard questions that would require me to think or know anything, let's just get that right up front.
Question: Are the Candy Candidates available for appearances on television or at national party conventions?
Answer: Yes. Their 10,374 page rider explaining their every requirement for appearances is available on request. Be advised they each require Presidential Suite level accommodations and a staff of twelve, individual limousine transportation with police escort, six armed bodyguards, a professionally certified humidity monitor, and a trumpet fanfare whenever they enter or leave a room. In the event of me accompanying them, they require additional armed bodyguards because they don't trust me not to eat them. They also want it understood before any contact begins, they are to be addressed as Your Sweetness at all times.
Question: is the rumor true one of these candidates Once tried to kill me?
Answer: Yes, but I've never heard that rumor before in my entire life. What happened is I once stood on the sidewalk in San Francisco for two hours to see Bill Clinton when he was president. I didn't know he was going to be there but once I saw all the snipers on the roofs and found out what all the commotion was about, how could I not wait and see the President? And of course being a pop artist without a state to govern I had nothing better to do. After all that I only saw the top of President Clinton's head in a crowd outside of Postrio, but I did see Hillary Clinton go by in the car waving, and I am fairly sure she looked right at me and waved right at me. That night my appendix ruptured, so of course there is only one possible logical conclusion. She obviously tried to kill me. But please don't repeat this rumor in case it gets around the beltway and she realizes I survived.
Question: why do some of the candy candidates look more attractive than me--i mean others?
Answer: Thank you for that question, Senator [name withheld in exchange for tax credit]. Didn't you see my flyer offering especially attractive adjustments to your Candy Candidate likeness in exchange for granting me an all expense paid ambassadorial appointment to Paris during Fashion Week or a lifetime supply of movie magazines and bonbons? Well, the Candy Candidates you think are more attractive did!
If you have any other questions for me, please feel free to contact me!
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Copyright © 2007 by Cindy Atmore